I feel so guilty when I come home to Mom and I'm too tired to care for her!

BEING A CAREGIVER FOR MOM OR DAD

Here in the United States many adult children need to grapple with the exceptional economic, social and personal revolution when they find themselves becoming the primary caregivers for an aging parent.  At least 80 percent of such elderly parent care is becoming compulsory for their adult children.  

Family Struggle

The keeping of your parents at home, the tensions created among adult siblings who often don't pull their share, and the psychological complexities of shifting from parent to giving the care-giving role to the adult child is enormous. 

There is a definite impact felt due to aging parent care, it is reflected in both emotional and physical effects, not to mention the monetary aspect of elder care.

The sustained stress of caring for a person who is aging can negatively affect the caregiver's health dramatically. The immune system becomes less strong; therefore that caregiver is more likely to get sick and even may stay sick longer. Depression is a well-known health problem for caregivers.

Financial Repercussions

The financial aspect of caring for an elderly parent means that at some point an adult child cannot do it all.  Thus if the adult child has the means to do so, outside help can be paid for in relation to elder care.  However, especially in these times of recession, finding the funds to enable one to accomplish this are running quite thin. 

An Answer

Though not a total answer to the eldercare problem, it is at least the answer to one facet of the problem.  http://hostandcare.com/ - Host & Care, is a worldwide community that puts together students and other travelers who are seeking free accommodations with families and seniors looking for care.  In other words the person that comes from another country is seeking to have room and board in return for a service.  In this particular case, the service would be to care for the aged parent that you have now become responsible for.  Unlike an au pair, there are no requirements for you to provide this person with a salary, and there is no government red tape in the form of work permits, etc. and the like.

In Exchange

Interestingly enough, in exchange for the room and board, people find that their parent is lavished upon, and even entertained.  Most people from another country wish to learn as much English as possible and therefore love to talk, but they also thoroughly enjoy speaking to an American about their own country.

On the other hand, most of the elderly love to reminisce about what they did with their lives including their love life as well as recounting their experiences in the world, be it a work world, travel and the like.   Often the only "work" that may be needed is a sympathetic ear, or just the fact that someone is there with your aged parent in case an emergency should arise.

A Heartfelt Experience

Interestingly enough those who participate in this elderly companionship exchange for free room and board often become fast friends with the family and form a relationship with the folks that lasts years and years.

Loneliness is one of the biggest problems that the elderly face and having someone from another country suddenly step in to do away with the boredom of daily life can give a welcome shot in the arm of your elderly parent.